Monday, November 30, 2009

last post!!!!

Wow. I seriously almost failed NaBloPoMo on the LAST DAY!

That's talent people.

I really have no idea what to blog about. So I'm going to say the 30 things I'm thankful for. Because I've been a little down in the dumps lately..blah blah see my last post... I am actually VERY thankful for this life, and sometimes need to be reminded of it.

1.Maddy. I love this girl. I decided that I love the age 10. She is still my baby girl but she is able to just hang out with me. I had the BEST weekend with her, and my bed is really empty now that she is back at my moms.

2.My insulin pump. Nuff said. I love this thing. Even though it has the ability to drive me a little crazy.

3.The DOC. And ALL of you in it. I swear I have no idea what my life would be like without all of you guys. I feel like it would be very very empty.

4.Nursing school. I am SO thankful for this. It is something I have dreamed of for years and to be able to be in it is just so amazing.

5.Little Koomkie. Which is the name that has been given to my sister Katys little baby. She gets to hear the heartbeat for the first time tomorrow! I already love little Koomkie.

6.The family I nanny for. I love them. They are such an amazing family and I have learned so much from them.

7.My family. I am SO thankful that I have each and every member of my family. They all are truly amazing.

8.My car. Even though I do not always love my car, it gets me from point A to point B and for that I am thankful.

9.Insurance. I don't really need to say more do I? Didn't think so.

10.My computer. <3.

11.My automatic car starter. Its supposed to snow tomorrow.

12.That I am getting all A's. :)

13. My friends, I have met some AWESOME people at school and I am so happy about that!

14.I don't want this to sound mean, but that that person that threatened my life at school is no longer at school. I feel a lot less stress about this.

15.Christmas music. I love it. LOVE.

16.Christmas decorations in my house. My stepmom and I put them up last week. It was nice.

17.The Indianapolis Colts. They are 11-0. Sweet huh!

18.My cousin ciara and little baby Reaghan that is due in March.

19.My health, although its not AMAZING its better then its been.

20. That I am DONE with NaBloPoMO!!! Yea!!!!

Night all.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

lonely

*WARNING-a little sad tonight, and I just vented, I'm not looking for pity or anything like that, just wanted it off my chest*


Have you ever questioned what you were doing with you life? If you were making the correct choices day in and day out? I wish there was some book that I could open up and it would tell me exactly what was going to happen and what I needed to do to get to that point.

I believe everything happens for a reason. If I didn't I would go insane. I also strongly believe that I will not be alone for the rest of my life.

I have to believe that also. Or I would not have any point in being here.

I have SERIOUSLY wanted few things in my life. I have wanted many things. But there are a few things that I want so badly. A husband is one of them. A family is another one of them. Feeling content with what I look like is another one of them.

So far I have zero out of three.

I have to believe that there is someone out there for me. I just haven't met him yet.

I just wish he would get here sooner. I am so lonely. I have not been this lonely in years. Everyone in my life has someone. Except me. It is embarrassing.

I am now entering the holidays and my 23rd birthday alone. I have not been out on a date in 7 months. I hate that but its true.

I know if I could loose some weight I would be in much better shape in the man department. I hate that that is true but I know that it is. No one wants to be with someone who is overweight.

Its not like I have all these cards playing in my favor. Sometimes I wonder if I'm even able to be loved. For so long I felt that having this chronic illness has made me unlovable. The scars on my body make me want to cover up and hide even more.

I just want someone to share this life that I DO have with. I know that I am not old but I feel like it.

I feel a little better getting this off my chest.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Saturday night Meme

1. Where is your cell phone?Crappy
2. Your significant other? Nonexistent. :(
3. Your Hair? Super long
4. Your Skin? Dry
5. Your mother? Love
6. Your favorite thing? Maddy
7. Your dream last night? Dunno
8. Your favorite drink? Diet Pepsi
9. Your dream/goal? Married/RN
10. The room you’re in? Bedroom
11. Your ex? lied.
12. Your fear? Loneliness
13.Where do you want to be in 6 years? Happy
14.Where were you last night? Home
15.What you’re not? Complete
16.Muffins? Delish
17.One of your wish list items? Boyfriend
18.Where you grew up? IN
19.The last thing you did? Yes Man
20.What are you wearing? Gym Clothes
21.Your TV? ON
22.Your pets? Black
23. Your computer? HP
24. Your life? good
25. Your mood? Tired
26. Missing someone? Yea.
27. Your car? Grandma
28. Something you’re not wearing? shoes
29. Favorite Store? Target
30. Your summer? Fun
31. Like someone? Sure
32. Your favorite color? pink
33. When is the last time you laughed? now
34. Last time you cried? today
35. Who will respond to this? Bloggers?
36. Whose answers are you anxious to see? yo's

Friday, November 27, 2009

all blogged out

I cannot think of anything to blog about. I could show you this cute picture of my sister Maddy and I from Thanksgiving eve. She is so darn cute!! Oh and Maddy is pretty cute too. KIDDING. I was talking about Madds.

I feel like my brain is mush. What more can I blog about? Did you brave black friday? I didn't. My mom did and she butt dialed me at 4:40am. That was no fun. At least I fell back asleep.

I woke up in the middle of the night and my bg was 102. I have no clue why I even woke up. But I didn't do anything like eat or take insulin and I woke up to a 197 blood sugar. WTH!! Why? My cgm cannot come soon enough! I'd love to see whats going on with me overnight.

Anyone see the Blind side? I'm going to see it tomorrow. OK goodnight. Enough rambling!!!!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

happy thanksgiving!

I had a great thanksgiving. How was yours? How was your blood sugar? Mine was weird. lol

This morning while I was baking the an amazing dessert I could not stay above 60 for anything!! It was not so bad because I had an excuse to eat the batter :P

Then at dinner my pump got kinked or something and didn't deliver all my insulin or something, which is when I decided that it should be illegal for pumps to fail during thanksgiving dinner... don't you agree? SO a gorgeous 383mg/dL was what i had to deal with after dinner.

Then all the kids got really tired (me from my high not the turkey) and fell asleep in front of the fire.. it was so nice!!


Maddy and I made these cake balls!! They were such a hit! They are just what they sound like...cake in ball form. And severely amazing.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

What do you think?

My blog needs a birthday.

Sounds like a weird question.. but its really not. Let me explain!

I started this blog in January of 2008. I had ONE reader. It was my cousin Ciara. I barely blogged, there would be random entries of random things here and there but no real consistency.

Last year in November of 2008 I decided to do NaBloPoMo. I thought it would be the kick I needed to start blogging again. It was.

During that month of posting every day, I found the Diabetes Online Community. I have no idea how I came upon it. I seriously feel like fell into the DOC. I read blog after blog of people just like me and I fell in love. :) I decided I would be a diabetes blogger. SO I started diabetes blogging. At this point my blog had been active for a few months, but THIS is when I became a diabetes blogger. Not just some random person who posted random stuff every once and awhile.

Still nobody read my blog but that is neither here nor there, I kept blogging! So here we are. A year later, and people actually read my blog! (i love you all, please stay!)

But when is my blogs birthday? How long have I been blogging? A year? Almost 2 years? HELP!! I don't know!!!

Thank you so much in advance!!! hehe

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

I haves an owie


See? Its actually 2 owies.

They hurt.

In all seriousness the one on my palm is kinda scary. I touch EVERYTHING with my palm. Its like a breeding house of infection! People with duh beetus have to worry about infections, especially in limbs.

I was at the gym last night and the thought of the infections that were in that place was enough to make me cringe, so I did the only thing I could think of and found some tape and guaze in my car and wrapped it up. I sweated the makeshift bandaid off though. uhh.

I'm thinking I should wrap the sucker up with some coban and guaze with a little neosporin under it. I don't want ANY infections. Those are annoying.

Only 2 more days till Thanksgiving!! YAYAYAY

So sorry this post is so light...

Monday, November 23, 2009

a fine line..

There is a fine line between wanting someone to understand what it is like to live with diabetes and not ever wanting them to have to deal with the disease.

Wanting the stranger in the mall to stop looking at you like you are weird/gross for testing your blood sugar and licking the blood off your finger.. but never wanting them to have to endure the daily blood sugar finger pricks.

Wishing your best friend would understand that going to the movies at that exact moment is just not possible because you "feel yucky"...but never wanting her to have to know what it feels like to be suffering from high blood sugars from a failed pump site.

Praying that the person at school that asks you every single day "can you eat that?" while you pull out your sandwich for lunch, will just GET IT and STOP ASKING...but never would you ever want them to have to count every single carbohydrate that goes in their body.

Wanting your baby sister to understand that we can't leave for the store right now because you have to wait for your blood sugar to return to normal before getting behind the wheel of a car..especially with her in it...but praying she never has to experience eating food when she is not hungry.. jut low.

There is a fine line between what we WANT and what we actually really want...

Sometimes I don't stop and think about it often enough... I often wish people could just UNDERSTAND. But never ever would I actually want them to be in my shoes. I don't wish this disease on anyone..

Sunday, November 22, 2009

a diabetes disaster...

There are some rules, or guidelines rather when you are using insulin pump therapy.

A major one is to reorder your infusion sets and reserviors when you have enough for one month left. Easy peasy right?

Well yes, in theroy. Unless something bad happens, like you don't have insurance.

I didn't have insurance because I quit my job to go to school, and I am back on my parents insurance, but it JUST became active on Wednesday. There were all these stupid issues with them "not having my social security number." And so many other things.

So last Wednesday I am finally officially insured. But I put my last pump site in on the previous Sunday. Oops.

I could not call Medtronic to order more sets until Wednesday, so I decided to just change the reservoir and keep the site in my belly until my new sites came.

I woke up on Thursday morning and my blood sugar was in the 300's. And it didn't leave the 300's at ALL. Not once the entire day. I took almost 50 units of insulin that day. (Thats a LOT for me)

I hoped and prayed my package of supplies would come on Friday. It didn't. My blood sugar stayed between 300 and 400 all day on Friday. I bolused and I took injections. I also did not have any Lantus. Which was my fault. So no long acting.

By Friday evening I was STARVING because I had barely been eating, and my BG was 403. So I called Medtronic and told them my issues and they said they would overnight me 2 QuickSets. Thank GOODNESS!

Now I just had to get through the night. I remembered I had a Lot 8 set that I had been recalled but I had not sent back to Medtronic yet, and I decided that I would probably have better luck with that set then the one that was inside me.

I looked down to pull it out and it was wet. With blood and insulin. WTF!! Thats all that went through my head. I pulled it out and wouldn't you know it was kinked! I have never had a kinked site before. I have absolutly NO idea how it happened. It was all still stuck to my stomach, except the edges that were pulling off.

But this my friends is why you must always reorder your supplies when you get low, and by low I don't mean putting your last infusion set in.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

One of those day...

I can't really explain today. But yesterday was weirder.

Something happened to me that has never happened to me and sounds like a horror diabetes story. Really.

But that will wait till tomorrow. I am going to bed.

Today we went to the IU vs Purdue game. The Hoosiers (IU) lost again :( 38-21 and the last touchdown was scored by purdue in the last 2 minutes, so that was better than last years 62-7 loss. THAT was very sad.

goodnight.

Friday, November 20, 2009

A MeMe for your Friday enjoyment

1. What are the traditional favorites?
Turkey, (sometimes deep fried!) Mashed tatoes(that are my job!) Pumpkin pie, stuffing, Waldorf salad...the normals.

2. What new recipes will you try this year?
I don't do all of the cooking, I just do the mashed potatoes, BUT I do have a little dessert planned :) and I'm excited about that!! Stay tuned..there will be pictures of it

3. What part of the meal do you never compromise?
MASHED POTATOES!! Haha This is turning into a blog about potatoes! As I stated in the last two questions, I make that potatoes. For good reason, when my parents were married my Mom made the potatoes and she made them amazingly. Then my dad had to make them...but he can't. We lovingly refer to the mashed potatoes that he made as paste-tatoes. SO GROSS! heh

4.Who gets to "carve" the Turkey?
My dad. The only carving I do is is of pumpkins!

5. Family style around the table or buffet style and everyone sits wherever there’s room?
Kind of both, We have a beautiful table, and as much food that will fit on the table will be put on it, but all other food is in the adjacent kitchen on our bar thing.

6. How many will be at your table this year?
My dad, step-mom, me, Sisters Katy and Maddy, Step-Sibs Michele and Chris, Grandma Macca and Katys little raspberry sized fetus!!SO 8!!!

7. Three best pies for Thanksgiving dessert?
Pumpkin Pie and Apple Pie. I don't really like any other pies.

8. Cranberry sauce… yay or nay?
YUK!! Nay! I do not like cranberry sauce! How un-American!

9. What time do you eat Thanksgiving Dinner?
Usually around 2:30ish. Then leftovers at like 7:00pm.


10. Favorite leftover?
I'm not really a leftover eater, so I don't really have a fav, so I'm going to go with Alison's answer of PIE!! Pie is never bad right?

Thanks so much Alison for letting me steal this MeMe from you! lol and also for making me THAT much more excited for Thanksgiving!!! I CAN'T WAIT!!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

RIP Kevin.

A little while ago I posted about my cousins friend Kevin.

He was a Type 1 diabetic. He didn't take control of himself. And he died yesterday morning because of it.

This is so shocking. I didn't know Kevin but I can't help but be affected by the news of his death.

At times I feel as if this disease will NOT bring me down, and others times I feel like I could just succumb to it. But I won't. I can't. Kevin left too many people behind in this world. He was only 25.

The thing about diabetes is that though it is not curable, it is manageable. I personally know how difficult it can be at times, but it just breaks my heart that some people cannot do it, and just give up. It sounds like that is what happened to Kevin.

My heart is broken today. I am so sad for him and all the he loved and loved him. RIP Kevin.

You can visit my cousin here, her heart is broken too.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

The sweet relief of INSURANCE!!

I HAVE INSURANCE!!!

THAT WORKS!!

AND AS I WAS ON THE PHONE WITH THE MEDTRONIC REP TODAY ORDERING MY PUMP SUPPLIES I ASKED HIM ABOUT HOW MY NEW INSURANCE COVERS THEIR CGM AND THE INSURANCE I HAVE WAS THE FIRST COMPANY TO COVER IT!!!!

I'm so happy. I want a CGM. I NEED a CGM. Food and when it is going to be digested is a mystery for someone with gasteroparrisis.

Anyway, it has been a few months since I've had my beloved OneTouch meter. And today I was reunited with it. :) I cannot tell you how comforting it was to hear the farmailiar "beep" of my meter synching with my pump. It felt amazing.

So in my absence from OneTouch the strips turned blue!! I like them. Have a good night!!!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Over halfway done with NaBloPoMo

And I'm running out of things to say!

But I have this problem with failing. I can't do it. It bothers me.

I'm writing a how to paper on how to change an infusion set of an insulin pump.

My brain is fried. Do you know how hard it is to explain on paper how to do a site change? Its mind numbing. I have to assume that my teacher knows nothing so I have to give the defination of EVERYTHING.

Anyway my brain is numb. And my birthday is less than a month away and I'm not ready to be 23.

that is all.

Monday, November 16, 2009

New specs!

Invincible. You know how they always say that teens think they are invincible? Well I was a teen not THAT long ago and yep. They do.

Why is that? What makes teens think that way? The non-maturity of their brains?

I think it also has something to do with the fact that being an adult is SO far away (except not really), that thinking about something going wrong when you are an adult is hard to grasp.

I spent way too long in my teen years not taking care of my diabetes. I KNEW what I was doing was wrong and I knew all the possible complications of not taking care of myself, yet I did it anyway. For too long.

So you can imagine why going to the eye doctor after putting it off for a year and a half was scary. But..

I have no signs of Retinopothy!!! YAY!! I had to have my eyes dilated though. boo. Usually I go to places that have the machine that just takes a pictures of the back of your eyes, but this place didn't have that so I had to get my eyes dilated. It hurt!

Bad-ish news, my prescription changed...it tripled in worse-ness in one eye and doubled in worse-ness in the other eye. Which honestly is ok because it is not related to diabetes!! I was soooo scared it was, they told me my Rx changed while the drops were dilating my eyes, so I didn't yet know if I had any bleeds of not. But all in all it was good and I got some new glasses!!!


What do you think?

Sunday, November 15, 2009

end of the weekend post

Yesterday was AMAZING!! Wasn't it? I love being a part of the DOC. I loved doing the big blue test! And having World Diabetes Day be the number one trending topic on twitter!!

It was amazing. :) I feel like I have nothing to blog about today. lol So I'll show you some pics from yesterday.


Friday, November 13, 2009

Thursday, November 12, 2009

"do you see that groomsmen up there...?

...He has seen me naked."

NOO not like that!! Get your mind out of the gutter!

My sister and I attended our friends wedding this weekend, and it was so fun!

I pointed up to the wedding party and told my sister that one of the groomsmen has seen me naked!

Hehe.

He is a nurse in the CICU at the hospital that I used to go to every time I was in DKA.

This is actually a very weird story actually. It was the last time I was in the hospital, January of 2008, and I was admitted to the CICU. (Cardiac Intensive Care Unit) For obvious reasons I was not looking my best. It actually makes my face turn red just THINKING about how I probably looked then. Anyway digression. You are not allowed to wear anything under your hospital gown except undies. So it was me and my nice hospital gown and some undies. What kind of undies do people bring for you to wear in the hospital?? Lets just say they were not granny panties.

Every morning this nurse would come in and ask me if I had had a bowel movement (UHH) and lifted my paper thin gown up to give me my lovenox injection and give me a little AM physical exam. MEANING he saw me naked. YEA. AWESOMENESS.

About a year and a half later I went out to the bar with my friend and his friend. His friend and I were just making friendly conversation and I asked him what he did, thus revealing that he had seen me naked.

I'm pretty sure he does not remember me. And if he does I'd rather not think about that.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

rrriiipp.

I'm assuming we have all done it. Ripped out an insulin pump site.

Its not a super fun thing to do! Or any fun at all really. But it happens, not often but it does.

The other day I was vacuuming with our amazingly awesome Dyson, and I pushed it out in front of me and as I was doing a stroke back toward my body, this little hole thingy perfectly hit my site and pulled it out, sorta.

It moved my cannula out and I think it went back in, but blood immediately showed up, and I decided it would be better to just switch it out.


Then about a week ago I got gutsy and put a site in my butt. I don't LIKE it there, but it likes to be there. Except I never remember that it is there and each time I've had it there I've ripped it out. Which I of course did, right before dinner. Bummer. THEN the very next day I went to school and suddenly got an intense burning in my stomach where my site was. It was all red and irritated looking, but the ever prepared diabetic that I am, I had forgotten my supplies at home!! My bg was good at 124mg/dL but it took all I had in me to get home and rip that dang thing off. Which is exactly what I did. After taking it off it looked like this!! SO irritated.

I went through 3 sites in 3 days. THAT was fun! not. They were sitting on my TV and I thought they looked like 2 eggs. Don't they?? lol

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

What is normal anyway??

Having diabetes, at least for me, has made certain things a little more complicated. My immune system for instance. I don't just get a little cold, I GET A COLD.

Its actually something we joke about a lot in my family. Nice joking of course, but its usually something like this: 'come on Jenny, can't you just get something little, like NORMAL people." lol. ok well its funny to us. I just like to do things BIG!

ANYWAY. I react to things poorly. Especially vaccinations. Me + Vaccinations = Big Stinky MESS!!!

My mom was telling me today that she remembers when I got my first round of vaccinations as an infant and how scared she was because of my reaction to them. She was very scared.

At 13 in November of 2000 I got my Tetanus DpT and had SUCH a bad reaction I had to wear a sling because my arm was so red and painful, I could not move it above my chest. 6 months later in May of 2001 I was diagnosed with diabetes.

Did the vaccine trigger some sort of auto-immune response and cause my diabetes? Who knows, maybe. Its a theory. Doesn't really matter now.

The whole point of this really long introduction is to tell you that I got my Hepatitis B vaccine on Thursday. I have to get it to do clinicals for nursing school, (which I don't do for over a year) then on Friday morning my mouth was broken out in what look like canker sores. The only one I could get a picture of was the one in the front but they are ALL over.


These STUPID things have made basically everything painful. Eating, talking, drinking, SLEEPING, just about everything. The kicker is that it has now caused an infection and my blood sugars are super duper high.

Super duper? What am I barney?
Digression.

I have been constantly using temp basals's of 130-140%. With all of my temp basals and correction bolus's I'm taking so much more insulin then normal. I average about 25-35 units a day on a normal day, but right now its 45-50!!


UHHH. DO you know how annoying this is?

Can't I just do anything normal??

I guess not!

Monday, November 9, 2009

D-blog day

I had this whole awesome post planned for today.


Now I can't remember it.


My cousin has a friend that has Type 1 diabetes. I don't know him, but my cousin has talked about him to me a few times.

He is not in control of his diabetes. I don't know if he has been for years now.

He was found in his unconscious in his apartment and right now he is in the hospital on a ventilator and dialysis because his kidneys have shut down.

I don't know if he is going to make it. I have only briefly talked to her on facebook.

For some reason the new of this really bothered me. I don't know him. I have never met him, yet I understand. We have a bond. Although we may never meet in this world, I understand.

The reality of this disease is scary. It IS able to be managed. Insulin is a treatment for diabetes, yet it is no cure. There are many people with diabetes that this happens to. I could have been one of them. I suffered from diabetes denial for a few of my teen years. I just simply decided that I did not want to have diabetes anymore. I barely did any testing or taking insulin. I ended up in the hospital with DKA many times and almost didn't make it once.

I now suffer the consequences of my actions. I have complications from my few years of uncontrolled diabetes.

But I'm alive. And I'm living.

Tonight I am sad. I am sad for this 20-something guy laying unconscious in a hospital bed because of diabetes. I am sad that I have diabetes. I am sad that YOU have diabetes. I am sad that we have diabetes.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Random bullet points

  • I have been studying since 9:00 this morning. It is currently 6:00pm and I will be studying all night long. Nursing school is no joke people.
  • The wedding I went to last night was awesome! It made me want to get married even more! I just need someone that wants to marry me!!
  • It is unseasonably warm here today. Its so odd. My dads car said it was 70 degrees outside earlier. It looks like its going to be a nice week too! Weird.
  • My dad is making burgers on the grill because of how nice it is outside! yay i heart burgers.
  • The Indianapolis Colts won today, they are now 8-0. whoo hoo!
  • My BG hates me. I'm convinced it does. I'm fighting yet ANOTHER infection. :( seriously. I'm not sure how many more infections my body can handle. I really feel like at some point it will have had enough.
  • The infection is in my mouth. Which makes it EXTREMELY difficult to eat. I have put this numbing stuff on my mouth each time I eat but it wears off quickly.
  • I. Am. Miserable.
  • My pump is giving me a temp basal for the next 7 hours of 130% or 1.3 units/hour. Thats a lot for me, and I'm just now making it into the 90's mg/dL.
  • Its been a great weekend, I have a lot to be thankful for, but I'm having a hard time seeing it today.
  • Have a good sunday night.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Long haired sisters

Katy and I are off to our friends wedding!!


We decided we are the long haired sisters, its my real hair and she has in extensions!

Congrats Jennifer and Howie!!!

Friday, November 6, 2009

Pictures becaue I am a slackerMcSlackerPants

Have you seen this error message before? I have seen it before when I have left my meter in my car overnight on a cold night. But never because it was too HOT!! While on the boat this summer my meter just got too hot!

This is a scene from a middle of the night low. This picture was taken 4:54am sometime this summer.
I went back up to my bed and look who was taking up the warm spot where my low body had been. lol.
OK so remember the great Lot 8 Fiasco of 2009? Yea that was fun. Well when I got my first batch of non lot 8's they were SUPER sticky. And each time I would insert them they would stick to my serter. For the rest of this box I had to manually insert them. Or else they did this!
Beware there is blood coming up. This picture I didn't realize that I was ALMOST out of insulin and I was at my sisters school for this presentation and its started bleepbleeppBEEEP-ing at me! I silenced it and took an injection with a syringe to cover me until I got home. I didn't disconnect for whatever reason, and when I got in my car to change it the blood had backed up like this! Crazy looking. It reminded me of an IV when its occluded.

But then when I was all reconnected and stuff I tested and I was 124! That was pretty amazing considering I ate a bagel for breakfast and didn't get the complete bolus for it.

Alright I'm off to bed! Night!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Bad diabetes habits

I have them. We all do! Well maybe not EVERYONE but we are all human. :)

1.Leaving a site in much longer than I am supposed to- You know like 5 days. The longest I have ever had one in was a week. It did not look so hot when I took it out. I know I should be better about it but I have to make those suckers last! Also, if a site is working? I don't want to risk it NOT working!

2.Guessing on my carbs-I do this way too often. I am getting much better with it but there is still those times where "ummmm that looks like 35 carbs!" Sometimes I'm right on but other times I'm super high or crash a few hours later. :(

3.Washing my hands before testing- What is this? I don't even know what this means. Do people really do this? lol I know that people DO and I know that I SHOULD. But I don't usually. Or ever. I take that back, I do it when there I know my hands are dirty, pretty much only because I don't want to lick my blood off my dirty hand. haha

4.Changing my lancet-UH. I really wish I was better at this. I know I COULD be, but I am not. haha. I have had then same box of lancets for YEARS. I think the box says its from 2006 and its still 3/4ths full.

5.LOGGING-If we were getting graded on logging, I would get a big fat F! Then right before my endo appt I log for HOURS in preparation for my appt. You would think I would learn...

I know there are more but they escape my mind at the moment. :)

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Grandpa

My Grandpa and I were very close. We had a bond that nobody else had. He used to tell me I was his favorite grandchild, I know he didn't have favorites, but I still liked him to say it.

He passed away on January 5th 2006. I was sleeping in the next room when he passed.

He had been dying for a long time at this point, so the Hospice care took him off all of his meds except Morphine to "keep him comfortable."

My Grandpa had Type 2 diabetes. He was dependant on Insulin. When he was dying they took him off ALL of his Insulin. I had a HUGE problem with this, and honestly I still do.

Most of you reading this have diabetes or know someone who has diabetes, have you ever seen them have a 500+ blood sugar for any extended amount of time and be comfortable?

NO. It is not comfortable. Yes he was dying, and Insulin was one of his meds that kept him living, but I think that if they were to give him a little bit of long acting insulin he would have been MUCH more comfortable.

For those of you who may not know, you do not have to eat or drink to require insulin, even if you don't eat you still need a basal insulin or your blood sugar will rise.

My grandpas blood sugar was SO high and all he wanted was some water (and a beer) but nobody would give it to him. :( I begged for them to give him just a little water. But water would make him live longer. Uh it was terrible.

I know that there is not much to be done about it now, but maybe when I'm a nurse I can advocate for dying patients with diabetes, because a high blood sugar while spilling ketones is NOT comfortable.

When I'm dying I hope my family lets me have a little insulin. Its what would be most comfortable.

What do you think? Would you want a little Insulin?

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

not witty title

Uh oh its 11:30 on day 3 of NaBloPoMo and I've not posted!

Its been a busy/weird day. I had a weird day at school. There was an issue that I hope gets resloved! I'm sure it will.

Then I went out to eat with my 2 favorite pregnant ladies EVER!! Ciara my cousin and Katy my sister!

It was so fun.

I've got to go to bed but I'll leave you with this amazing photo from about a year ago of when I sat on a pump site. It was funny. I have an interesting post for tomorrow!!


Monday, November 2, 2009

MeMe!!!

So I know its only day 2 of NaBloPoMo...but I'm doing a MeMe.

No I have not ALREADY run out of things to blog about...

I am TIRED. I had 3 exams today and we got our Mid-term grades (all A's so far!) AND I have a paper due on Thursday that I may or may not have barely started..

So its a MeMe Monday today. :) Enjoy! I stole this from the diabolical diabetty!

1. Do you like bleu cheese? No! Uh it looks yucky...I have honestly never tried it. I should probably not admit that! But I will admit that I will NOT be trying it anytime soon!!

2. Have you ever smoked? Yep! BUT thanks to the support of the DOC, my family and some crazy strong will power that I pulled out of god knows where, I quit on February 17th 2009! I have almost been cigarette free for 9 months now!!!

3. Do you own a gun? No, that is not really my thang. My dad has some though.

4. Favorite type of Food? Type of food? I prefer the edible yummy kind. lol I love snack food! Which is my downfall. :(

5. Favorite type of music? Oh I'm so not a music person. I always dread this question when getting to know someone...I'm just not a music person, I listen to the radio and enjoy whats on the top 40 station for the most part. Well if we are really being honest my FAVORITE type of music is show tunes :) Oh so dorky. I love me some show tunes!

6. What do you think of hot dogs? I think about this one time when I was innocently watching How its Made and they told me how HOT DOGS WERE MADE AND I CRIED. I have never looked at a hot dog the same way since. Which is sad because I loved hot dogs!! (warning, that is a link to the episode of How its made when they make hot dogs, so don't click it if you like hot dogs)

7. Favorite Christmas movie? OOO I love Christmas movies! I love a Charlie Brown Christmas, The original cartoon Grinch, Elf, A Christmas Story...did they ask for one?? lol

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? DIET PEPSI. YUMMM We didn't have any this morning, and I was all screwed up all morning, or maybe it was the fact that the sun was up when I was driving to school??

9. Can you do push ups? HAH! I can do girl ones? does that count? and maybe 1 real one.

10. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry? Hm thats a tough one, I have a few pieces of jewelry that my aunt made me that I love, one in particular is a necklace with a cross on it and pretty beads :) I don't wear it as often as I used to, but it is my favorite.

11. Favorite hobby? Does sleeping count? I have many hobbies, blogging, tweeting, sewing, oh and SLEEPING!

12. Do you have A. D. D.? I have ADHD. Which is sorta kinda the same thing except kinda not. They always told my parents and I that I would likely grow out of it by puberty or adulthood...but I'm pushing 23 and I still have to take medicine for in. Oh well, could be worse!


13. Do you wear glasses/contacts? Yep, I wear glasses. Only for 2 and a half years, before that I had perfect vision. But it has nothing to do with diabetes...so they say

14. Middle name? Lynn. But its Jennifer Lynn not Jenny Lynn. I may be from Indiana but please don't call me Jenny Lynn!

15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment: My foot itches, I need to go pick up dinner from BWW (yay!) I have so much homework to do.

16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink: Diet Pepsi, Water, Juicy Juice

17. Current worry? Getting this silly paper done, and done well!

18. Current hate right now? Hate? I try not to HATE. Oh I do hate being single... I'm so tired of it.

19. Favorite place to be? I'm not sure, I do love my room. But I just love to be anywhere there are people that I enjoy being around!

20. How did you bring in the new year? Is it sad that I had to look at my blog to see? I went to a house party and got dressed up with my friends!

21. Someplace you’d like to go? ooh lots of places! I'd love to go back to Hawaii, I'd like to see more of the West coast, and New York.

22. Name three people who will complete this. Anyone who is as lazy as I am!!

23. Do you own slippers? Yea, one pair, but I don't wear them. I want new ones!

24. What color shirt are you wearing? Purple. day in and day out I wear PURPLE!! The scrubs that I am required to wear to school everyday are purple. I don't look so good in purple.

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? I wouldn't know. I never have! But I'm not sure I would, I like to be warm!

26. Can you whistle? Yes, sadly its like some sort of addiction of mine, I whistle too much! I get it from my Dad!!

27. Where are you now? Sitting at the kitchen table.

28. Would you be a pirate? Argh. I would dress up as one! But as far as a real one, I don't think so, they were mean!

29. What songs do you sing in the shower? Whatever is stuck in my head at the moment! I usually whistle in the shower most of the time!

30. Favorite Girl’s Name? I love the name Elizabeth Anne. :)

31. Favorite boy’s name? Not sure! I have not put much thought into it lately.. I can tell you what I will NOT name my children and that would be Michael, John, or Steven. There are about five hundred of those in my immediate family!! Although they are all great names, they are just over used in my family! My Grandpa was John Thomas but he went by Tom, I think a little Tommy would be cute!

32. What is in your pocket right now? nothing! I only have one breast pocket and its not good for holding stuff

33. Last thing that made you laugh? Haha my step-brother was playing with the stick of a sucker he had just eaten, and a rubber band, and somehow flung it all the way across the room at me! He didn't know it was going to happen so it was funny...to us at least.

34. What vehicle do you drive? 2001 GrandmaMobileOh! I mean Ford Tarus! haha its my grandma mobile!

35. Worst injury you’ve ever had? Um well it was not so much an injury but rather an illness that caused some awful back problems! In 2006 when I was 19 I got Viral Meningitis and was in the hospital for awhile and since Meningitis is in the spine it really messed up my back and neck. It caused neuropothy, and I still have pain. :( I'm ok though!

36. Do you love where you live? Yes! I actually love Indiana, and I am blessed to have parents that are able to take me in while I am in nursing school!

37. How many TVs do you have in your house? um 9 and we are getting another one! ah! that sounds terrible! one in each bedroom, parents have 2 in their bedroom, one in the kitchen, one in my dads office, 2 in the basement. And we are getting one for our great room!

38. How many computers do you have in your house? 6 plus some odd stuff that might produce a computer in the basement.

39. If you changed your job, what would it be? I don't have a job now, but I would not want to change anything! I can't wait to be a nurse!

40. If you were granted three wishes, what would they be? 1.A cure for Diabetes 2. Good health care for my loved ones FOREVER! 3. A HUSBAND!!! ok I'll start with a boyfriend...can you tell I'm lonely?

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Happy halloween and NaBloPoMo

Happy (late) Halloween!!

Can you guess what I was??

The tooth fairy!
We had a few friends over to hang out around the fire pit.

Spongebob was there!

And Jenny the hippie from Forrest Gump and Tinkerbelle

The cutest cowgirl ever!

And my little sister who is 5 weeks pregnant was there.. can you guess what she is?

And my Dad and Stepmom wore tacky Grandma and Grandpa Sweatshirts

I made my sweatshirt, my Dad's and Katy's. Michele made her moms. It was fun :)

Did you all have a good Halloween? I was diagnosed with Diabetes at 14 in May so I didn't have to deal with the whole trick-or-treating dilemma. But I can't imagine it would be easy!

Are you participating in NaBloPoMo?? I have decided to take on the challenge... I work well with pressure. :)

Have a good Sunday!! Happy November!!